The biggest stress is expectations—those that others have of us and those we impose upon ourselves.  Expectations of how the holidays should be may keep us from enjoying a period of   simpler, more meaningful joys.

Start planning now:

10 weeks in advance (Mid October)

· Start pre-planning. lay out a timetable and don't get caught in the feeling of being rushed to fit things in at the last minute

· Check the calendar now. Christmas Day and the first night of Hanukkah coincide this year; Kwanzaa begins the next day. Orthodox Christian, Islamic, Sikh and other holidays occur in January. If you have family members who celebrate different festivals, talk with everyone about how, where, and when celebrations will take place.

· Ask yourself questions about previous holidays to define your planning.

What do you remember best about the holidays?

What was draining and stress-producing?

Is there something about holiday time you'd like to re-capture?

Use your answers to make healthful changes to lessen stress this year. If family and friends will be involved in your new plans, propose and negotiate changes with them now, before schedules are set.

· Determine who will help. We don't have to do it all and we don't have to do it all alone. Enlist others, set priorities, and simplify!

8 weeks in advance (beginning of November)

· Set limits according to your personal situation. You may want to curb the cost or amount of gift-buying you do. If so, talk with family, friends or co-workers now to reach agreement on this.

· Other ways to control holiday pressures:

o restrict the number of events you attend;

o limit how many people you invite to a home party;

o eliminate a stressful long-distance visit that you've made in previous years.

o If certain rituals trigger sadness, change them or create new traditions to replace them.

o Organize your gift list. Shop now to avoid crowded stores and out-of-stock items. Or order online—shipping costs are usually lower when you have time to wait for delivery.

o To keep stress at bay, try to finish your shopping by Thanksgiving.

6 weeks in advance (mid November)

· Wrap and label gifts. Keep a list, but put items in a closet or at a friend's house.

· Consider how much time you realistically have for decorating. Set up a brief schedule for   getting it done gradually.

· Create a list of food specialties you enjoy making, choosing only those that can be baked or cooked and frozen in advance. Begin making those items now and freezing them for holiday parties. 

· If you enjoy sending holiday cards or letters, prepare them now. Reduce your mailing list by as much as possible.

4 weeks in advance (Late November, Early December)

· Are you entertaining at home? Assign guests to bring dishes that must be prepared fresh, such as salad.

· Sometimes, family events may be too stressful. For some people, not being with family is actually a good idea."

o Make alternate plans, so you'll feel comfortable declining graciously.

o If you feel you must attend, line up friends to support you in person, by phone or via email.

o Volunteer to help out at a hospital, food pantry, or shelter. This year, with hurricane disaster-related needs, social service organizations will be hungry for willing workers.

The final (sometimes-crazy) days

· You may start having symptoms of stress (headache, diarrhea, anxiety, etc.) as the holidays draw near. If so:

O Listen to your body and slow down.

O Eliminate anything left on your to-do list.

O Get at least seven to nine hours sleep every night.

O Take daily walks with a friend, a dog or soothing music on your headphones.

O If you use a gym regularly, but the holidays have thrown you off schedule, take time for a work-out. Your emotions and your body will thank you.

O Take a few deep abdominal breaths to calm yourself.

http://www.healthywomen.org/wellness/emotionalwellbeing/destresstheholidays#