15 Styles of Distorted Thinking

Home
For Veterans and Their Families
Coping Skills, Information and Personal Stories
Disclaimer
If You Are Feeling Suicidal
Psychosocial Rehabilitation Recovery Center
Bridge Awards (PRRC)
Veterans/Myhealthevet
Psychiatric Service Dogs
NAMI Connection and Family Support Groups
Links

 1. Filtering:  You take the negative details and magnify them while filtering out all the positive aspects of a situation.

2.
Polarized Thinking:  Things are black or white, good or bad. You have to be perfect or you’re a failure. There is no middle ground.

3.
Overgeneralization:  You come to a general conclusion based on a single incident or piece of evidence.  If something bad happens once you expect it to happen over and over again.

4.
Mind Reading:  Without their saying so, you know what people are feeling and why they act they way they do.  In particular, you are able to divine how people are feeling toward you.

5.
Catastrophizing:  You expect disaster.  You notice or hear about a problem and start “what if’s”   What if tragedy strikes?  What if it happens to you?

6.
Personalization:  Thinking that everything people do or say is some kind of reaction to you.  You also compare yourself to others, trying to determine who’s smarter, better looking, etc.

7. Control fallacies:  If you feel externally controlled, you see yourself as helpless, a victim of fate. The fallacy of internal control has you responsible for the pain and happiness of everyone around you.

8. Fallacy of Fairness:  You feel resentful because you think you know what’s fair but other people won’t agree with you.

 

9. Blaming:  You hold other people responsible for your pain, or take the other tack and blame yourself for every problem or reversal.

10. Shoulds:  You have a list of ironclad rules about how you and other people should act. People who break the rules anger you and you feel guilty if you violate the rules.

11. Emotional Reasoning:  You believe that what you feel must be true – automatically.  If you feel stupid and boring, then you must be stupid and boring.

12. Fallacy of Change:  You expect that other people will change to suit you if you just pressure or cajole them enough.  You need to change people because your hopes for happiness seem to depend entirely on them.

13. Global Labeling:  You generalize one or two qualities into a negative global judgment.

14.
Being Right.  You are continually on trial to prove that your opinions and actions are correct. Being wrong is unthinkable and you will go to any length to demonstrate your rightness.

15.
Heaven’s Reward Fallacy:  You expect all your sacrifice and self-denial to pay off, as if there were someone keeping score.  You feel bitter when the reward doesn’t come.

 

 9. Blaming:  You hold other people responsible for your pain, or take the other tack and blame yourself for every problem or reversal.

10.
Shoulds:  You have a list of ironclad rules about how you and other people should act. People who break the rules anger you and you feel guilty if you violate the rules.

11.
Emotional Reasoning:  You believe that what you feel must be true – automatically.  If you feel stupid and boring, then you must be stupid and boring.

12.
Fallacy of Change:  You expect that other people will change to suit you if you just pressure or cajole them enough.  You need to change people because your hopes for happiness seem to depend entirely on them.

13.
Global Labeling:  You generalize one or two qualities into a negative global judgment.

14.
Being Right.  You are continually on trial to prove that your opinions and actions are correct. Being wrong is unthinkable and you will go to any length to demonstrate your rightness.

15.
Heaven’s Reward Fallacy:  You expect all your sacrifice and self-denial to pay off, as if there were someone keeping score.  You feel bitter when the reward doesn’t come.

Combating Distorting Thinking

 

The following exercise is designed to help you notice and identify distorted thinking.

Read each sentence below and identify the style of distorted thinking that it exemplifies.

Ever since Lisa I've never trusted a redhead.

Quite a few people here seem smarter than I am.

If you'd be more sexually open, we'd have a much happier marriage.

I worked and raised these kids and look what thanks I get.

You're either for me or against me.

I could have enjoyed the picnic except the chicken was burnt.

I feel depressed. Life must be pointless.

You can't fight the system.

It's your fault we're always in the hole each month.

He was a loser from the first day he showed up.

It isn't fair that you go out and have fun while I'm stuck doing homework.

He's always smiling, but I know he doesn’t like me.

I don't care what you think, I'd do it exactly the same way again.

We haven't seen each other for two days and I think the relationship is falling apart.

You should never ask people personal questions.

 

Once you have began to recognize the distorted thoughts write counter thoughts to them.

 

For example:

 

Not all redheads are like Lisa and I can trust them.

I am a smart person.

We have a good marriage and I can help by being more open myself.

Kids don’t always remember to say thank you but I am a good father/mother.

I am not responsible for other people’s thoughts about me.

I enjoyed the picnic.

I feel depressed but I can use coping skills to get through it.

If I have patience I can learn to get what I need.

We can work as a team to manage our finances.

He is different from the rest of us and we can make him feel more comfortable.

I am doing homework so I can have a good future.

I can’t read people’s minds.

I can be pleased with the things I have done without worrying about other people’s opinions.

I will not push things or predict the future.

I can ask people personal questions but it is up to them if they answer or not.

 

From Thoughts and Feelings—The Art of Cognitive Stress Intervention by Matthew McKay and Martha Davis, New Harbinger Publications, 1981.

 

click here to download pdf file